Wiping his sweaty face with a handkerchief, Amos said, “You are not my spec. Your acne never goes away even with all these products you use. Take a look at yourself,”
“You look too dry and you are not even that bright. I don’t think I can marry you again.” He spatted on the floor. Threading his long nails in his hair, he said, “God! What was I thinking the first day I met you?”
“I’m so sorry. I will do something about it. Please don’t leave me.” Chioma said trying so hard to stop her quivering lips.
Some of us are Chioma and this is our everyday experience. Being mocked for attributes we have almost no control over. We are forced to carry this emblem of shame around even when we don’t want it to follow us. Our perception of self worth becomes almost nonexistent. What happens next is we begin to self destruct because as usual valueless things are treated recklessly. On tables where we deserve a seat and a voice, we shy away as much as possible because our mirrors overlap images that we interpret as inferior. We keep people at arm’s length because the fear of relationships and interaction clouds our resplendence. But tell me dear, why you live in pain , fear and anxiety because of some unsolicited snide comment someone made about you? Why are you forcing an unnatural metamorphosis in yourself?
You were created by the most nimble fingers. You radiate originality.
You have to start focusing on you because you are essential. Start learning to love yourself. If you have a deficiency that can’t be fixed, it is very hard to not to wallow in self pity. You will not feel good but what you should not do is live in perpetual misery. You were created by the most nimble fingers. You radiate originality. Knowing this gives you power to tune out all negative opinions. With time, you will be brave enough to stand and walk tall. Living life as you should be doing and not just passing with time.
Self love can eclipse your need for external validation. Get help if you need to. You want to shed some weight? Hit the gym or create one for yourself. Your skin is prone to cracking and acne? Try a new skincare regimen. Your work is said to be mediocre? Seek mentorship and read more books. You don’t want to flunk? You will flunk if you don’t seek help anyway. Make up your mind. If you can’t do it alone, find help. It’s never too late to speak up.
If your problem is something you cannot change, get comfortable with it. In short, get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Embrace your imperfections because they make you up. You are beautiful. You are smart. You are lovely. Preach affirmation to yourself daily and get people to do same for you, if you need it. You deserve to attain peak zen. Forgive yourself for all the opportunities you denied yourself due to marring comments. You can do it. It’s not late. If you went length to gain external acceptance, why won’t you do it for yourself? You are your own person and it’s facts that no one would love you better than you. You can’t give people room to love and care for you if you don’t love yourself. You can only give what you have. Love attracts love.
If you are worried people will disregard your concerns, remember everyone has their insecurities. No one has got it all figured out. Channel your energy to solving your problems. Don’t push yourself too hard at first because there are chances you will relapse if the changes you desire do not commensurate with your efforts. Thread patiently.
When you love yourself, others will love you for who you are. You are not perfect and that makes you human. A beautiful and lovely human. You will not self sabotage anymore. Don’t over edit yourself to suit anyone. Nobody should wield that much power over you. When you fall in love with yourself, you become capable of loving and accepting those around you, just the way they are. Have you ever been in love before? ( I hear “Yes” and your subconscious saying “No”). Again, it’s never too late. Fall head over heels in love with your being. Forgive yourself for not starting early. Accept yourself. Love yourself. You are not selfish. It is called self prioritization. Like Beyonce said, “You are part of something way bigger not just a speck in the universe…” Give yourself some credits because You are enough!
With a wide smile. I am appreciating all the efforts you have made to love yourself. I encourage anyone who feels unworthy to try. I Loveeeeeeeeeee you.❤
Spread your love and share to your friends too. 💞Don’t forget to like and give a shout out to yourself.✌
A big thanks to Faridat, My hot cake for editing and re-editing. God’s blessings dear.💟🙏